Why Is Change More Difficult For Some Children Than For Others? – Being Parents

Change is not always easy for adults, so imagine what it must be like for children. It is true that when things change, we get used to the circumstances in order to be able to move forward,  although it may be easier for some than for others.

Change is difficult for the majority of people, and even for the most optimistic adults. It arouses stress in everyone and  learning to deal with this stress and the emotions that make us feel bad is fundamental  to being able to cope with change and move forward.

Change is a part of life and therefore it is important to help children learn how to adapt to it. For some, this can be particularly difficult.

As parents, we need to understand why this is more complicated for some than for others. By doing this, we will be able to help them successfully overcome the process of change.

Children’s temperament

Children are born with a temperament, which is genetic. It appears during prenatal development. Parents know this intuitively when they realize that their newborn baby has a personality that defines them.

This personality can be influenced during early childhood development. It can be formed according to the experiences and temperament of the parents.

Children who tend to be more negative, fearful or slow may have a little more trouble with the change than quiet children. Parents can help these types of children by focusing on the positive aspects of the change and motivating them to learn to differentiate between realistic thoughts and thoughts triggered by anxiety.

Trust and attachment issues in change

Some children, for various reasons, have difficulty with confidence or may have attachment problems. For them, change can be traumatic. If you have a child who can face these kinds of challenges, it will always be good to help them through this process of change.

Explain to him what to expect. Stay connected with your child and encourage them to talk about their feelings. Help him stay positive when he thinks about the coming change. That way, if he can express what he feels or knows what to expect from the new situation, he can better overcome it.

Often times, fear of uncertainty or not knowing what will happen will prevent people from preparing for change. Talking about it or imagining possible scenarios will help your child get a sense of the change and overcome it.

It doesn’t matter if the results are different:  his mind will have prepared for the changes to come. He will therefore feel more peaceful in the face of new circumstances.

Behavioral problems at the time of change

Many behavioral problems make change particularly difficult. For example, a child with attention deficit disorder (ADHD) needs to build structure. If one changes his predetermined structure, he may not know how to deal with it or how to adapt.

The same happens with a child with oppositional defiant disorder, who may get angry, or an extremely sensitive child with an anxiety disorder who may have depression or have episodes of catastrophic thinking. .

When it comes to children with a disorder, their perspective should be taken into account. The little ones need to know the expectations of this change and understand why it is happening.

The importance of dialogue

For example, if you move, your child will be more comfortable with this decision if he understands the reasons for it. On the other hand, children need time to adjust to the concept of change. While it is true that this is not always possible, it is always good to give a sensitive or careful child time to think about the change and express their emotions.

In any case, in case of changes in the family, it is always good to talk about it with the child. He must be able to express his feelings freely. You need to help him focus on concerns that are realistic  while letting go of fears that are not.

Children adapt easily when they know what to expect. Help your children focus on the positive side and encourage them to make an effort to make the change as successful as possible. With your help, and once you understand why he is struggling with the change, you can  guide him to make the process easier for everyone.